kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
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