You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Randomize
