Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
you made out with another girl for some wings
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
