GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize