i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
Randomize
