Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
The struggles of a small town man whore
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
