all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
Randomize
