Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Randomize
