Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
Randomize
