just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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