I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
Randomize