Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
I forgot wine drunk hurts
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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