i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
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