everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Randomize