fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
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