Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Randomize
