I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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