It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
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