the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
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