And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
