sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
Last night: Repeatedly yelled about how the fishbowl tasted like blue, stole a stranger's hat, hugged the DJ for playing my request, made out with my roommate, and abandoned the guy I dragged to the club in the first place
This morning: Hat doesn't fit, hangover headache is blue, and I can't move without getting lightheaded
Listen when they tell you not to drink after giving blood
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
do nipples grow back?
Randomize
