Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Randomize
