Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
Randomize
