Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
Listen, dont tell me about your day or that your mom is in town. Don't ask me to drive you to the airport or proofread your paper. Text me when and only when you have a boner. Oh and take your pants off and leave your front door unlocked because I'm coming over.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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