i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
