I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
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