its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
This can only be settled by a dance off.
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
