There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
Randomize
