I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
