And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize
