I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize
