there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
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