You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Help. Why am I so naked?
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