nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
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