Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
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