I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
Someone shattered a urinal.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
Randomize
