How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
Just sold all of my pants in order to buy tonight's whiskey. Goodbye, high functioning alcoholism. Hello, Dad.
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
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