David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
Randomize
