Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
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