SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
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