Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
He's a Shit stain on my heart
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
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