Its about making memories worth repressing
The bartender told me the best pick-up line was to look deep into her eyes and tell her your gonna flick her vagina
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Randomize
