im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize