At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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