the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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