spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
Randomize
