Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
well most of my day revolves around power hour
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Randomize
