Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Opened my wallet to find a slice of ham with a phone number written on it in sharpie.
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Randomize
