Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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