she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Randomize
